Shouting, “I am Alive!” on this Walk

Just returned home from a full day of IV and oxygen therapy.  Been a long day and I am tired.  But you know what?  I am alive!!!!!!  I want to shout it from the rooftops even though right now I walk kinda like an elderly lady from doing battle all day with the Lyme. 🙂

So, my beautiful husband came to pick me up from my treatment today.  When he got there, the IV was still slowly going.  My blood pressure was so low today that it was making my blood come back into the IV tube with each heartbeat that I had.  It caused all the bags to go in very slow today.  So, we still had about 30 minutes left of the last bag when he arrived.  The internet and cable had been down all day and I had sat there alone in my room making lists, reading, thinking and praying. Just after Steve arrived, the cable and internet came back on.  They were able to pull up a show for us to watch.  Last week I started watching all the re-runs of “Cheers”.  I actually got through about 10 episodes! Hadn’t seen that show in years and years.  But, you know what? It made me laugh! I actually sat there and laughed.  They say laughter is a great healer.  🙂

So, today we watched one episode of “Cheers” and then headed out.  We hopped into Steve’s car with the windows rolled down (because he believes in spending his money on my healing he says instead of fixing his air conditioner….he actually drove through the hot summer without AC so as to keep the money flowing towards my treatments…I love this man so much!), our arms on the edge of the windows, the tape wrapped around the end of the gear shift holding it on because again, hubby isn’t spending unneccesary money right now and off we drove.  When he started the car the radio came on blaring a hit from the 80s.  He quickly turned it off .  I am sure he did this because for the past few months I have not been able to tolerate much noise in any shape or form due to the Neuro Lyme. Today was different though.  I actually felt like listening to the old 80s songs from our “days”.  There was a time in my life where I totally would not consider listening to those old “wild” songs.  I would only listen to the latest Christian songs on the radio.  You know what?  You gotta live life a little!  I grabbed the knob and turned the radio back on and up!  Yes, I cranked that baby.  We zipped out of the parking lot, two middle-aged people in-love for 30 years with each other and jammed. 🙂  My hair whipped around in my face as we drove 75mph on the interstate and I felt like we were 18 and 21 again.   It felt SO good to be alive! The sun was shining brightly down on us in the late afternoon and we enjoyed jamming to the “old days’ songs”.  Just before we arrived home, John Cougar Mellenkamp came on singing.  This is the guy from my home state- Indiana!  Steve asked if it had me thinking back to my days in Indiana.  It did. But, most of what it had me remembering was being a healthy, young girl walking 5 miles a day, playing tennis almost daily, riding bikes, and being alive.  We sang together loudly, “ain’t that America..”.  We  smiled at each other and held hands as we sang our hearts out.  Ain’t that America?

We turned onto our street and saw our elderly neighbors on their front porch who we always wave at as we go by.  We did not bother to roll up the windows nor turn down the radio.  We continued to jam out with John Mellankamp blasting and us singing along.  We raised our hands up and smiled and waved as we zipped by.  I did the” wave” (after we passed our neighbors)  out the window while we continued singing at the top of our lungs. The wind continued to whip through my hair and I didn’t care!  I just wanted to hang out the car window and shout to the world, ” I am alive!!!! I am winning this battle against Lyme!  I am alive!!!”

We pulled up to our house and sat in the car for a minute continuing our jam session. Then we got out as our children poured out of the house.  Steve grabbed me and hugged me.  I stood there all disheveled from the wind looking up at him, but smiling from ear to ear feeling like an 18 year old again. Laughing and smiling, I hung my arms around his neck and hugged him tight saying, “I love you so much”.   I am alive!  Right here and now I am alive! I know Steve has “missed” me for years and especially the past 3 months, but today he has me back if only briefly.

We often hear from others that Steve and I have a special relationship.  We have heard it since we first met on the first blind date for both of us.  Steve’s roommate in the army told him the same thing before we got married.  He said that our relationship was so special and that everyone wished they had one like us.  All we can say is God put us together and He has been the one to keep us together.  He gets all the glory in this.  We will say that having fun has been a big key to our relationship the past 30 years. 🙂  So, if you are feeling down or struggling with a relationship, you might want to go take a long drive, roll the windows down, turn on the radio to your choice of music, and sing your heart out.

Just wanted to share with you all that I am shouting, “I am alive!” on this walk! 🙂



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